Those who stayed and struggled

I've been back for a decade.. more or less.

Losses

As a result of the level of homophobia in work and my lack of tolerance for it, I do not think I have had the career I would have had had I stayed in foreign.

But in some ways,.. I don't regret that.

I think it helps me keep a healthy sense of life balance.

I earn enough that I am comfortable.

I am single and do also admit that the closeted aspect has increased tensions, particularly when you are not at the same level.

I remember a particularly heated conversation about going out to diner before a movie.
At that time, I preferred eating at home,.. she was a decent cook, because once the lights were off,.. the theatre was intimate.

But in restaurants, you do occasionally get stares,.. but it doesn't go further than that.

That said if you retreat to house parties.. I do find that because the reality that we socialise within social classes, that the relationships quickly become rather incestuous.

And I hate getting introduced to family members as a friend. And acting.

I do realise this is because I am out to my family and am not reasonably sympathetic.

I hate waiting outside for hours outside a gf workplace, because she cannot say her partner is waiting for her so she has to leave NOW.

I have actually done this for a co-worker... dealt with our supervisor.

I do recommend that you identify yourself to others.. so we can support each other.